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Hence there is a great need to assign due importance to relaxation as well as to other important tasks in your life so that you are able to maintain a balance between your professional and personal life. When you keep ignoring your personal duties or relaxation in order to attend to more and more professional tasks, you keep sending more and more messages to your subconscious mind that you only want to pay attention to your profession and you are willing to ignore or even sacrifice any other important sphere of your life, in order to achieve desired results in your profession. As more and more such messages keep reaching your subconscious mind, a stage comes when your subconscious mind accepts this script and starts working according to it and it starts giving you what you kept asking from it.
Hence, your subconscious mind starts treating your profession as the most important thing in your life and as this problem gains strength, your subconscious mind starts treating your profession as the only important thing in your life. As a result, it starts motivating you to ignore all other tasks or people in your personal life so that you may devote more and more time and attention to your profession, in order to achieve more and more success. Hence you start ignoring relaxation, your personal duties and even the people who are dear to you due to which, problems start surfacing in these spheres of your life. Though you may keep achieving more and more success in your profession, the problems in other spheres of your life also keep gaining more and more strength and by the time you realize there is need to restore balance between your profession and other important spheres of your life, an irreversible damage has already been done in most cases.
There is no doubt that profession is one of the most important spheres of your life but it is not everything in your life and there are other important things too, which need your attention from time to time. As the saying goes ‘Excess of everything is bad’, working too much and ignoring the other important things and people in your life is also bad. Doing so not only causes problems in other spheres of your life but it may also affect your ability to work at your best, in many cases. This is because, once the problems start appearing in many spheres of your life, they start disturbing you and as you suffer more and more losses through those problems, your physical as well as mental output decreases as you are not the same strong and balanced person that you used to be. Hence your performance at work also drops.
Proper rest and due relaxation are very important to keep you healthy, both physically as well as mentally and therefore you should take due rest and relax yourself whenever it is needed. Many of you may have witnessed that when the players of a football team or cricket team play too many matches in a relatively short period of time, their performance drops and they start losing matches. This is because their schedules demand them to work too much and that overwork takes a toll on them since they are not able to rest and relax themselves as much as they need, in order to maintain their optimum level of performance. Accordingly, their performance starts dropping and as a result, they start losing more matches than they usually do. Some of these players even go on record and say that they have been playing too much in the recent times due to which their performances have dropped and they need a break to relax and hit the game again, with their strengths restored.
We all use mobile phones and various other gadgets which draw their energy from their batteries. In order for these gadgets to keep performing for us again and again, it is compulsory that the batteries of these gadgets are recharged at regular intervals as otherwise, they will lose all their power and stop supplying energy to the gadgets and accordingly, the gadgets will stop working.
Similarly, the cars we drive need fuel, maintenance and rest at regular intervals in order to perform at their optimum, and if any of the above mentioned ingredients is missing, our cars either don’t perform at their optimum or they don’t perform at all. For example, if you don’t get your car serviced for a long time, its performance starts dropping and you can feel that it is not working at its best. Likewise, if you keep running it for hours and hours without giving it the required amount of rest, it gets heated up more and more and a time comes when it refuses to move further until you let it cool down. Similarly, if you don’t get your car filled with fuel, it will consume all the fuel it already has, and once the entire fuel has been consumed, it refuses to work at all, until more fuel is given to it.
Just like our gadgets and cars, all the things and entities in this world need due amount of rest and resources in order to keep performing at their best. Same is the case with us humans and we also need due amount of rest and relaxation at regular intervals in order to keep performing at our best. Ignoring due amount of rest and relaxation and working too much will start decreasing your performance like a car which has not been maintained properly for a long period of time and that is why you should use due amount of rest and relaxation in order to recharge yourself and keep performing at your best.
Other problems with working too much are that you tend to ignore your family members as well as your health since you keep yourself busy with your work most of the time and accordingly you don’t find it important to pay due attention to your health and family. This starts creating problems in your family and as a result, you may have to witness heated arguments, frequent fights, no communication for long periods of time and in the worst cases, you may have to suffer the loss of an entire relationship.
Paying too much attention to professional work and ignoring your life partner is one of the primary reasons which cause so many divorces in this day and age. People are giving so much time and attention to their professional work that they keep ignoring their life partners and their needs again and again. Professional success has become the most important part of their lives for these people and they have become obsessed with their professions. All they want to do is to keep achieving more and more success in their professions and accordingly they keep achieving it as their subconscious minds will always support them in achieving the thing they want to achieve the most.
But this success comes at the cost of relationships and the relationship of a husband and wife is the one which takes maximum damage from this obsession with work, in most cases. This is because the institution of marriage demands a good amount of time, care and attention from both parties in order to keep running smoothly, and the people obsessed with working too much are usually not able to give any of these things as much as they are required. Many times, I have come across couples who have had major issues when one of the two gets a promotion plus a transfer to another state. The partner getting this promotion asks the other one to relocate whereas the other one refuses to relocate as doing so will cause problems and setbacks in his or her professional sphere.
This is a situation where one of the two has to take a professional loss or make a professional compromise in order to keep having a happy marriage, but none of the two is willing to make a compromise or take a loss in most such cases, and both of them expect the other one to make that compromise. It’s strange how you expect your near and dear ones to make sacrifices and compromises for you when you are yourself not willing to make the same sacrifices and compromises for them. In some of these cases, one party unwillingly makes a compromise or takes a loss seeing no other option is available, and this forced compromise gives rise to grudges which will definitely hurt this marriage, sooner or later. In some of these cases, such professional issues eventually break a marriage as none of the two is willing to make professional compromises in order to keep their marriage healthy.
The reason is obvious, these people have become too much focused and too much obsessed with their professions that they are willing to take any losses in order to keep achieving more professional success, even though such losses may mean their life partners asking for a divorce. You should understand that your profession is just a part of your life and it is not your entire life and accordingly you should pay due attention to other spheres of your life also along with paying due attention to your profession. Always remember that a good life lies in a good mix of everything from each sphere of your life and too much of anything will ruin your life, in most cases. So take a balanced approach towards life and stop letting your work ruin your personal life.
In order to treat this problem of too much work, start maintaining a schedule for your work as well as rest and relaxation. For example, if you are in a job where the working hours are 10 hours a day and five days a week, make sure that you don’t do your professional work apart from those 10 hours a day on weekdays. Stop doing overtime and especially stop bringing home your office work as doing so can seriously disturb your family life because no husband, wife or kids want you to be the office guy even when you are at home with them, after working long hours at the office. Use this time to relax yourself, take some rest and spend some time with your family members or friends so that you may attend to some of their needs, which strengthens your relationship with them.
The days when you don’t have to go to your office like weekly holidays, plan them in a way that you are able to spend this time partly in relaxing, resting and entertaining yourself, and partly in attending to the needs and demands of your family members. For example, if your wife and kids want you to take them to a movie and a dinner afterwards, don’t keep yourself busy with work on holidays and instead take your family to a movie and treat them with a nice dinner afterwards. Likewise, you can read a book, surf on internet, watch a movie or some other TV program, go for swimming, help your wife with some domestic tasks, listen to her and help her making decisions on some family matters or matters related to her profession, play with your kids, help them in studies and do many more such things which may look small and avoidable to you but which in reality are the keys to a happy life.
Always keep in mind that professional success can only bring you more and more rewards which means that you can afford to enjoy more and more, but in order to enjoy more and more, you must develop an attitude or a subconscious habit to enjoy and relax and that is why you need to enjoy and relax every now and then. Most professional offices across the globe give you weekly holidays and they keep your daily working hours limited, only to make sure that you get sufficient time to relax and rest properly in order to keep performing at your best as otherwise, what is the point in offering weekly holidays if all you want to do on those holidays is to work more from home.
Many people keep working too much thinking that they will start enjoying once they achieve a particular level of success which they have set for themselves. This is a very bad approach as these people keep working more and more, avoiding relaxation and enjoyment more and more, in order to reach the level of success they want to achieve and by the time they achieve that level of success, if they ever achieve, they have developed a subconscious habit of not enjoying and relaxing at all. It means that through those repeated conscious acts of working too much and relaxing little, they have written a strong script on their subconscious minds, which says that work is everything and enjoyment, relaxation or even family is nothing compared to it.
Hence when they reach that particular level of success, they will not be able to enjoy and relax as they don’t have a habit of enjoying and relaxing, and instead they have a habit of working too much. As a result, the subconscious mind of such a person will convince him to set another professional target instead of enjoying, whenever he achieves an already set professional goal. It’s funny how people decide to enjoy and relax only when they will reach a certain level of success, not knowing that like all other good and bad habits of the subconscious mind, proper relaxation and enjoyment are also subconscious habits and not the things you can master all at once. How can you be able to enjoy and relax after a certain point when you have been intentionally avoiding all such relaxation, enjoyment and rest which kept coming your way from time to time, as and when they were due.
You simply won’t be able to enjoy at that particular time or anytime in your life for that matter because you have written a script on your subconscious mind that you want to work too much and you don’t want to relax or enjoy. Accordingly, your subconscious mind gives you million reasons not to enjoy and billion reasons to work more, whenever you achieve a target that you had set and you had decided to start relaxing and enjoying after achieving that target.
So if you want to relax and enjoy in future, build and maintain this habit in the present as it is not going to happen otherwise. It should be noted that engaging in relaxation and enjoyment doesn’t mean not working at all or working little and relaxing more and more, as that will itself become a problem. Hence you should organize all important spheres of your life in such a way that your life becomes a balanced mix of all of them, and too much of none of them. So build your life in such a way that you can pay due attention to your professional work, family and family affairs, rest, relaxation, enjoyment, health and other important aspects of your life. The best type of life is a balanced life and not the type of life which tries to touch one extreme whether that extreme is working too much or not working at all, relaxing a little or relaxing too much and other such extremes. So avoid the extremes and try to reach and maintain a balance between all important spheres of your life.
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To be Continued
Lord Shiva Bless You
Himanshu Shangari