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Hence choose wisely, which way you want your subconscious mind to behave so that you may not have to complain later on. If you want your subconscious mind to help you concentrate on important tasks, send it the messages of concentration and not the messages of distraction, through your conscious acts. Your subconscious mind is only obeying your requests and acting according to them and hence it can’t be blamed for giving you any good or bad habit. It is you and you alone who is responsible for any particular good or bad behavior of your subconscious mind as at some point back in time, you had yourself trained your subconscious mind to behave in this specific way and now that you don’t like this behavior, the only way to get rid of it is to start telling your subconscious mind to adapt to a new behavior. It is a behavior that you want and a behavior that you have to teach your subconscious mind through your conscious and specifically target acts which in present case will be conscious acts of concentrating and focusing on one thing at a time.

Looking at some other activities which can promote this negative habit of lack of concentration, having tea or coffee while writing or reading something important, watching TV while talking to someone on phone or talking to someone while watching TV, talking on phone while reading or writing something important, watching or talking to other people while doing such exercises in gym which require complete focus or concentration, talking on phone while you are cooking, talking to other people while driving car, eating or drinking something while driving, talking to other people while filling some important form or doing some other important job which requires a lot of concentration, chatting on Whatsapp or attending to Facebook when someone is telling you something important, talking to other students instead of listening to the teacher or coach when he is delivering a lecture or teaching you how to do something, and many other such activities which you do in a way that while you are doing one activity, you are distracting yourself to one or more than one other activities.

As you keep engaging in more and more such conscious acts of distracting yourself while doing something important, you keep sending more and more signals to your subconscious mind that you don’t want to focus on one thing at a time and instead you want to attend to two or more than two things at a time. As you keep sending these messages to your subconscious mind through your conscious acts, your subconscious mind registers your choice and it starts acting according to it. Hence whenever you tend to do a task and you are not doing anything else simultaneously, your subconscious mind starts suggesting you many other things to do by sending ideas related to those things so that you may choose one of those things to distract yourself.

All this works fine as long as you are engaging in activities where you wish to attend to more than one thing at a time because this is what you like doing; like in case of watching TV while eating your meal, you are engaging in two activities at a time with your own choice. On the other hand, when you tend to engage in a task which is very important for you and you want to concentrate on it with your hundred percent, the same behavior of your subconscious mind becomes a problem for you, a problem which you only have created, a problem which you don’t want at this particular time and a problem which is called lack of concentration. Yes, your subconscious mind tries its best to engage you in various types of distractions when you are doing something very important, but it is only due to the fact that you have trained your subconscious mind to act like this whenever you are doing something important or even when you are doing something in general.

Therefore if you don’t want your subconscious mind to stand against you when you are trying to focus on something important, train your subconscious mind in a way that it works towards keeping you away from all types of distractions when you are doing something important. In order to do so, you have to send continuous signals of ‘I want to focus on one thing at a time’ through various types of conscious acts that you engage in, in your day to day life. Your subconscious mind works best with one type of script at a time and it does not do well with two opposite scripts or two opposite habits at the same time. Hence you can’t expect to teach it that it should send you all types of distractions whenever you want it to do so and at the same time, it should stop sending any distractions to you when you tell it that you are doing an important job.

It simply doesn’t work like this and it is not going to happen. So if you want your subconscious mind to help you focus when you are doing something important, you have to first train your subconscious mind and tell it again and again that you are a ‘One thing or one task at a time’ type of person and when you are doing something, you want to do that thing only and nothing else. As you keep telling this again and again to your subconscious mind, slowly but surely, it adapts to your new demand and starts working according to it. When this happens, your habit of lack of concentration starts getting treated as more and more focus and concentration start coming to you.

Concentration is the secret behind the great successes achieved by various people in the history of mankind and without proper concentration; you can’t achieve top level success almost in any sphere of your life. Therefore if you want to get best results in many spheres of your life, you need a very good level of concentration and if you need a very good level of concentration, you need to train your subconscious mind to deliver that concentration to you as and when you need it.

Looking at one more reason which can promote lack of concentration when you try to do something; not liking something much or at all and still doing it is one practice that will almost always result in lack of concentration needed to complete that task in a proper way. Many people do this mistake and as a result, they find themselves struggling while doing such tasks which may be related to any spheres of their lives. For example, if you don’t like science as a subject at all but you are still pursuing studies in science, you can’t expect anything else but lack of concentration whenever you try to study and learn this subject, which further translates into getting average or even below average results in this subject.

Taking another example, consider you are a girl and you have starting dating a guy who you really don’t like much and this dating has been set up by someone or under some specific circumstances in a way that you fell into this scenario. You can try as hard as you want but you will not be able to concentrate on this guy and instead, within a few dates or so, you will start building repulsion for this guy. As a result, you won’t like most things he does and you won’t bother much about what he likes and what makes him happy or what you should actually be doing to take this relationship to the next level. This keeps happening and eventually you decide not to date this guy any longer. Once again this is happening so because you really didn’t like this guy much but you tried to push yourself to like him which does not happen in most cases and accordingly, it didn’t happen in your case too.

The more you tried to push yourself, the more repulsion started building inside you due to which you lost your focus on this guy and as a result, things which were bad for relationship, started happening. For example, whenever you went out with this guy for lunch or dinner, though you might be having a meal with him but your focus was somewhere else and you were not able to enjoy whatever he was saying or sharing. Instead you started feeling bored in his company and really wished for this dinner to end at the earliest so that you may move away from this guy. All this happened because you tried to do something you didn’t like due to which your subconscious mind kept distracting you from this guy and therefore you could not focus on this guy, no matter how hard you might have tried.

Let’s now look into the reason for this distraction which happens when you don’t like a person or a task but you still try to engage. Imagine the time when you tried some food item which tasted very bad, you disliked it instantly and so much that you didn’t want to try it ever in your life. As a result, you don’t even bother looking at this food item whenever it is present among a variety of food items, at a party, buffet or any place else. Likewise there was a particular perfume that you smelled at a time and you didn’t like it at all, instead it gave you a feeling of disgust and so you chose not to smell it or use it again since you hated this smell.

Moving on, you met a person and you didn’t like him at all, instead this person gave you vibes of boredom or disgust and so you decided not to socialize with this person any more. Whenever you see this person anywhere, you try your best to avoid meeting this person and socializing with him as you don’t like him. In order to avoid him, you start looking for other available activities or people who can serve as a distraction to you so that you may engage in something else or with someone else and avoid this person. There are many other examples of this type but I think the message I want to convey has been conveyed. If we don’t like a person, thing or activity at all, we tend to avoid it with as much strength as possible and this is where your subconscious mind comes into the picture.

As you keep sending messages of disgust and disliking for people and things you don’t like at all, to your subconscious mind, and as you try your best to avoid these people and things whenever you come across them, you keep telling your subconscious mind that you don’t want to focus on things and people you don’t like. These messages also say that you really want to avoid these people and things whenever you come across them and in order to do it effectively, you are willing to use any available distractions which can help you shift your focus away from them.

As more and more of these messages keep reaching your subconscious mind, it starts understanding your demand and accordingly it starts helping you in this regard. As a result, whenever you see a person you don’t like at all, you face away so fast that your conscious mind doesn’t have much time to dislike that guy and then make you face away. This whole practice is carried out by your subconscious mind and that is why it happens so fast that it looks like a reflex. All the reflex looking practices are conducted by your subconscious mind and not by your conscious mind because conscious mind takes time to understand a situation and then guide you accordingly whereas the subconscious mind has already been notified about a particular situation and how to react in that particular situation.

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To be Continued

Lord Shiva Bless You

Himanshu Shangari

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Through lives of experience and recordings available with it, your subconscious mind considers the act of eating a major meal, a very important task in your day to day routine as well as in your life. This is due to the reason that a wide variety of food items have become available only in the recent years and throughout the history of mankind, food has not only been our primary need but it has also been difficult or very difficult to find at times. Your subconscious mind has a record of all those lives of yours when you found your food with great difficulty and once you found it, you ate it with complete concentration, enjoying every single bite of it as if the world has ceased to exist for you, while you are eating this food. Hence your subconscious mind attaches a very high value to eating a major meal, based on its past experiences.

When you pay more attention to TV and less attention to your food while eating a major meal, this conscious act not only conveys a message to your subconscious mind that focusing on one thing is not important but it also sends a second message which says that you like to pay attention to other things while doing your important tasks and you don’t want to pay your undivided attention to important tasks. The second type of messages are the ones which worsen your problem of lack of concentration because you are sending more and more signals to your subconscious mind that you want to attend to or think about other things when you are doing your important tasks.

These messages are finally recognized by your subconscious mind and they are registered on it. This is where your problem starts building up as you are telling your subconscious mind that you don’t want to pay complete attention to one task at a time and you are also telling it that you can afford to focus less and less on the tasks which are important for you. As these messages take shape of a script written on your subconscious mind, it starts putting resistance whenever you choose to engage in an important task and you want to devote complete concentration to it. This is because, according to your subconscious mind, you are not a person who pays attention to one thing at a time and you like to do other things also while doing important jobs.

Understand this fact that through your conscious acts, you only requested your subconscious mind to believe that you don’t want to do one thing at a time or pay complete attention to one thing at a time and though it took time for your subconscious mind to agree and adapt to this request, but it finally did and it started supporting you accordingly. As a result, whenever you try to engage in jobs which are important for you, your subconscious mind starts sending many distractions to you in the form of various thoughts and imaginations due to which you find it difficult to focus on the job you are trying to do. This is when your problem of lack of concentration has started interfering with your performance and this is why it has become important to treat it as otherwise it will keep gaining more strength and keep troubling you more and more.

Going back to the old and wise times, now you may understand why in the old times, there were special places made for eating major meals and the food was not served to anyone in their bedrooms, on their study tables and other such places. Intimation was given once the food was ready and all the members of a family or a group had to go to a specifically chosen place to eat their major meals. These places didn’t have any means of entertainment in them and the ambience of these places featured complete calm and composure so that the people eating their food may not be disturbed or distracted by anything else.

Look at this whole practice and try to learn from it. A specific place for eating major meals was chosen in every house and the members of the family went to that specific place at the time of eating their major meals. In addition to it, people were advised to maintain silence while eating which was to ensure that their complete concentration goes to the act of eating and any part of their concentration should not be directed to any type of talking or gossip. This whole practice made every member of the family aware and conscious that eating food was an important job and accordingly, it needed to be done at a specific place and at specific times during the day.

Hence when they came to eat, they were fully aware that they were going to perform a very important task of their daily routine and accordingly they tried to put as much conscious effort and concentration into it, as much they could. Further, it was a custom in many families that before eating, all the members or the head of the family would pray to God and thank him for blessing the family with food which was the most important thing to keep them alive and healthy. This whole theme made sure that people eating food paid attention to food and food only and nothing else, as eating food was a very important task for them and accordingly, they devoted their complete concentration to this task.

Likewise, the people in the old times had assigned timings and values to various jobs and in most cases, they used to do one job at a time and they avoided trying many things at the same time. This was not due to the reason that they were not intelligent enough to try the phenomenon of multitasking but it was due to the fact that they wanted to build and maintain very healthy levels of concentrations. This is why all such things were practiced as through each one of these conscious acts, each one of them kept sending more and more signals to his subconscious mind that whenever he did something, he wanted to concentrate completely on that task and nothing else.

Their subconscious minds adapted to this script and accordingly they helped these people focus more and more on anything and everything they engaged in. With conscious small day to day acts, these people developed a subconscious habit of paying attention to one thing at a time and accordingly, they faced few distractions when they tried to do something important as their subconscious minds supported them in focusing completely on the task they were attempting and the same subconscious minds put resistance if ever these people wanted to engage in a distraction while doing something important. They had trained their subconscious minds to focus on one thing at a time and that training blessed them with great amount of concentration because concentration is nothing else but the ability to focus completely on the thing you are doing.

Coming back to the topic, watching TV while eating your food is only one of the activities which can write a script of lack of concentration on your subconscious mind and though it is a very important activity when it comes to writing and confirming this script, doing this activity alone is not likely to write a strong script of lack of concentration on your subconscious mind. This is because, in case of most negative as well as positive habits, a single activity in a specific sphere of your life is generally not capable of giving you a permanent good or bad habit or personality trait. Hence a conclusion should not be drawn from a single act or event and the conclusion should be reached after carefully looking at a series of events. In case of this habit, the people suffering from this habit are doing many such things in various spheres of their lives, which contribute to and which confirm this habit of lack of concentration.

Another common activity which can promote this negative habit is talking on mobile while driving a car or some other vehicle. The mechanism is the same in this case also and accordingly in this case too, you are sending the same two messages to your subconscious mind through your conscious acts, which you send through previously mentioned activity. The first message says that you don’t want to focus on one thing at a time and you want to do more than one things at a time whereas the second message says that even when you are engaging in important tasks, you want to distract yourself to some other tasks and you don’t want to devote complete concentration to your important tasks.

The reason for the first message is obvious and needs no explanation. Coming to the second message, driving a car or another vehicle is indeed a very important job for your subconscious mind as well as in actual practice. This is an activity which if not done properly, can result in attracting damage to your vehicle, someone else’s vehicle, your life or someone else’s life too. Hence you should stay focused on driving and driving alone when you are engaged in this act and you should not engage in activities like talking on mobile which can distract you from your primary activity and result in an accident.

But if you choose to do so and keep talking on your mobile every now and then, while you are driving your car, you keep sending the already mentioned two signals to your subconscious mind, through this conscious act of yours. As more and more of these signals keep reaching your subconscious mind, they start taking the shape of a script which says that you don’t want to concentrate on one job at a time and you like to distract yourself to other things even when you are doing some very important tasks. Once this script takes place and once your subconscious mind starts acting according to this script, it starts motivating you to distract yourself to many other things and ideas, whenever you choose to engage in something that you consider important and you want to concentrate on it.

You have told your subconscious mind again and again that you don’t want to concentrate on one thing at a time and you want to indulge in other activities while doing one activity, even if that one activity is one of the important activities of your day to day life. Your subconscious mind may have taken time to listen to you and adapt itself accordingly but it finally did and now that it has started behaving according to your taste, you have started complaining that you are not able to concentrate properly whenever you wish to do something important. This is simply not fair as your subconscious mind is behaving only in the way you asked it to, and when it starts doing so, you start making complaints about its behavior 🙂

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Lord Shiva Bless You

Himanshu Shangari

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Lack of concentration is one more problem which is affecting many people nowadays and due to this problem, these people are finding it difficult to perform at their best as they are not able to focus on their projects, in the best possible way. Concentration is one of the key elements if you wish to achieve success whether that success is related to your profession or it comes in the sphere of relationship. The people who are able to concentrate on their professional projects or on their important relationships, usually succeed at them and achieve good results, whereas the people who lack concentration in professional sphere or in the sphere of relationships, tend to either get below average results or they may see complete failures in these spheres.

Look at the lives and schedules of people achieving great things in various spheres of life and you will find that most of these people have complete focuses on what they want and they don’t lose sight of their missions even for a short period of time. For example, look into the life and routines of a famous football player and you will find that he had his undivided concentration on this game right from an early age due to which he could engage in more and more practice and could become better and better at this game. Even when he became an established player and stared gaining rewards through this game, he still kept his complete focus on his game and kept training with the same undivided concentration, throughout his career.

Accordingly, this player not only succeeded but he was able to maintain this success for a long period of time compared to some other players who might not have reached the same level of success or who might have achieved the same level of success but they couldn’t maintain that level for a long period of time and they fell from that level to a lower level. The reason for not achieving success in case of first type of players is that they were not focused enough on their games and accordingly they could not obtain as good results as the player in our example did. In case of second type of players who did achieve the same type of success but could not hold on to it for long, they concentrated on their games completely until they reached that level of success and once they reached that level, their concentration level dropped and accordingly the level of their success dropped too.

This means that in order to be successful in any sphere of your life, concentration is first required to achieve the level of success you wish, and it is then required to maintain that level you have achieved. Hence if you want to achieve success in any sphere of your life and want to hold on to that success for as long as you can, you simply can’t afford to have lack of concentration on your target because as the level of your concentration or focus on your target drops, so does the level of your success. So your success in any particular sphere of your life is directly proportional to your level of concentration on that particular sphere of your life.

Let’s now look into this problem of lack of concentration and find out why do many people suffer from this problem and what exactly are the root causes of this problem so that we may know the treatment for this problem as getting to the root of a problem is absolutely necessary if you want to remove the problem from the root. This problem has its roots spread to many things that we do in our day to day lives and accordingly it can be called more a problem of lifestyle than anything else. It means that most people suffering from this problem have issues or serious issues with their lifestyle and that is why they are suffering from this problem. We will now take a look at some important issues of day to day life, which contribute a lot in giving birth to this problem and then in making it bigger and bigger.

A division of attention to more than one thing is the root cause of this problem. Accordingly most people suffering from this problem agree that the reason they can’t focus on a particular thing, project or person is that they keep thinking about other things, projects or persons. It means if you can think about and concentrate on one thing, project or person at a time, you will be able to produce best results related to that thing, project or person. But how can we be able to focus on one thing, project or person at a time and why do we deviate to other things, projects or people in the first place?

The answer to this question may seem difficult but it is very simple. The reason you are not able to devote complete concentration to a thing, project or person is that you have a subconscious habit of attending to more than one thing, project or person, most of the time. It means that your subconscious mind has a script written on it, a script which says that you want to focus on many things or people in most cases and you don’t want to pay complete and undivided attention to most things, jobs or people who you come across. Since your subconscious mind has this script written on it, it puts resistance and tries to deviate you to other things or people whenever you try to devote your complete attention or focus, to a single thing or person.

You may be wondering how this script was written on your subconscious mind and what did you do to write this script? Well, you only wrote this script through specifically targeted conscious acts which you have not only been doing in the past but also in the present, and that is why this script was written on your subconscious mind and it is still sticking there. Let’s now find out what conscious acts people engage in due to which a script of lack of concentration is written on their subconscious minds, so that we may get to the root of this problem and find a solution to this problem.

Looking at some of the most commonly done conscious acts promoting the habit of lack of concentration, most people suffering from this problem have a habit of watching TV or something else when they are eating or drinking anything. It may sound strange how watching TV, watching something else, listening to something or talking to someone while eating or drinking can contribute in giving birth to this habit and then promoting it; but in reality it is one of the root causes of this habit of lack of concentration and here is how.

Each time you watch television or keep yourself occupied with something else while eating your meals, this conscious act sends a signal to your subconscious mind that you don’t want to engage in one job at a time and instead you want to engage in more than one job at a time. This is the time you should know that you may not consider eating your meals a job, but it is a job for your subconscious mind and in fact it is one of the most important jobs that you do, when seen through the eyes of your subconscious mind. Keeping you alive and keeping your body hale and hearty is the top priority of your subconscious mind and in doing so, the intake of calories and important nutrients is a very important step as without eating sufficient calories and nutrients, you will risk your health and eventually your life too.

Hence when you sit for eating and especially for eating a major meal in the day, your subconscious mind considers it one of the most important jobs that you do in your day to day routine and accordingly it watches you with great attention when you start doing this task. This is because of the reason that your subconscious mind wants to observe and learn how you wish to attend to the most important tasks of your life. Hence the message you convey to your subconscious mind while performing this conscious act of eating a major meal is very important in making your subconscious mind decide, how you want to attend to the most important tasks of your life.

As you start eating and you start watching television at the same time, this conscious act sends a signal to your subconscious mind, which says that you want to engage in other things when you eat or when you attend to an important task and you don’t want to focus completely on your meal. As you keep engaging in this practice of doing something else while eating your major meals, you keep sending more and more signals to your subconscious mind that you don’t want to focus completely on your primary task and instead you wish to engage in other things also, particularly things related to entertainment which are the things you engage in through most such media like watching TV, listening to something and other such activities.

As these messages keep reaching your subconscious mind again and again, by virtue of your repeated conscious acts of the type already described; slowly but surely, these messages start taking the form a script which says that you wish to engage in many other activities while eating your meal and you don’t wish to focus on your meals completely. As this habit of watching television while eating your meals gets stronger and stronger, you tend to treat watching television as your primary activity and eating meals as your secondary activity and this is where your problem starts becoming worse because you have now started sending one more signal to your subconscious mind with each one of your conscious acts of this type.

As you become addicted to watching television while eating your meals, you start concentrating more and more on TV programs and you tend to focus less and less on your food. I have personally witnessed many people who watch TV while eating their major meals and they watch TV with so much interest and concentration that they can hardly concentrate on eating and enjoying their food. Their faces are up and directed towards TV sets and while they are watching the programs with great interest, their hands are subconsciously picking up the food items from the plates and are then putting them into their mouths.

Once this food goes into their mouths, they are still not conscious enough to forget TV and enjoy the taste of each and everything included in this food and instead they treat chewing the food as a secondary activity, with their primary activity being watching TV. Hence most of their food travels from their plates into their mouths and then into their stomachs without them having much feeling of the exact taste or essence of the food items or in other words; eating and enjoying the food becomes a secondary activity which takes place in the background while they are busy watching TV. Eating meals is your primary activity when you sit for eating, but you don’t pay required attention to it and on the contrary, you make it look like an unimportant activity for you which can be compromised for watching TV.

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Himanshu Shangari

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While lending money, car or other valuables to your friends, care should be taken that you should lend your money and valuables, only to those friends and relatives who you believe are good ones, who really need these valuables and most important of all, who according to you, will return your valuables in good condition after using them and who will return your money on time. True personality development is all about balance and therefore, you should not start suffering losses related to your money and valuables, just in order to treat a negative habit as that will give birth to another problem, while treating one problem. Hence you should take a balanced and wise approach when sharing your money and valuables with near and dear ones.

Once this level is also mastered, you are now ready for the next level which demands you to give due space to the people you love or to the people you are related to. At this level, you should start giving more space and freedom to your girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, husband, children, friends and all other dear people, and you should allow them to enjoy their lives according to their own choices. For example, don’t bother much when your girlfriend chooses to talk to some other guys or she opts to have many other male friends, as she has a right to her own life and she can live it the way she wants, until she crosses the line where it starts hurting your relationship.

On the contrary, you can promote and support her in doing such acts, like you can encourage her to make more male friends if you feel that she wants to make more male friends and she is not doing so only because she is afraid that she might offend you, hurt your feelings or make you feel uncomfortable. Simply take a step forward and encourage her to do so and let her know that you trust her, and her happiness and freedom is the most important thing for you. You should try and do the same to your wife, husband, boyfriend, children, friends and relatives, and you should give them more freedom and space whenever it is needed.

Some of you may think that by giving this much freedom and space to your girlfriend or boyfriend, you are risking your relationship as he or she may find a person better than you and he or she may leave you for them. In reality, this is just a fear and nothing else and you are not going to lose your girlfriend to some other guy by doing so if you are a good person and on the contrary, you are only going to make her respect you even more and love you even more.

Contrary to what some people may think, your girlfriend or boyfriend, your husband or wife, are not always looking for better people or better choices. For example, your girlfriend will not leave you for a better person in most cases, if you are a good enough person or even a reasonable person to be with. Your girlfriend will leave you for someone else only if you are not a good person, you don’t respect her enough, love her enough, care for her enough or you lack many of other such good qualities. If such is the case, she is anyway going to leave you sooner or later, no matter whether you allow her some freedom or not.

Most people are not always on the lookout for the best person in the world and they don’t want to run from one person to another in search of a better, further better and further better person until they have reached the best person. It doesn’t work like this at all. Most people want to settle in their lives and when they find someone good enough for them even though this someone may not be the best person or a very good person even, they will settle with this person in most cases. It is only in the cases when a person is not good enough for someone or not good at all, that the second person starts looking for other options as they don’t want to waste their life with someone who is not capable of adding any value to it.

Therefore, if many of your girlfriends have left you for other people and you are now afraid of giving any freedom to your current girlfriend, fearing that she may also find someone else and run away, you are not treating your problem but you are making it even worse than it is. This is because, you are trying to hold on to her so tight and block her breathing space so much that she has no choice left but to push you away or to move away from you so that she may get some comfort. Hence, restricting her freedom and being too possessive is only making your problem worse and it is not helping you at all.

It is the time to learn and understand this fact that if many of your girlfriends have left you, the fault probably doesn’t lie in them but it lies in you, and instead of finding more and more ways to stop your current girlfriend from running away, you should find more and more ways to fix yourself and make yourself a better person who can add some value to his girlfriend’s life. If you are good enough to provide value to your girlfriend and make her happy, she is not going to leave you in most cases whereas if you have many negative habits and you can only make your girlfriend feel uncomfortable and miserable in your company, there is no way in the world you can stop her from leaving you no matter what tricks you may try.

Hence this Heaven as well as this Hell lies within you and you only, and other people are not responsible for whatever good or bad is happening to you, in most cases. If your girlfriends, boyfriends and many other people around you are leaving you from time to time, it only means that you are not a person worthy of their company, in most cases. So instead of cursing them for leaving you or finding faults with them, it is the time to start doing something to improve yourself and make yourself a better person, so that more and more people should attach to you and not run away from you.

Coming back to the topic, as you allow more freedom and choice to the people around you, and yet better, as you motivate and support them to make the most of their lives, they will start respecting and loving you more and more. This is the time when you learn that the more you try to possess a person, the more he moves away from you whereas the more you liberate a person from conditions, the closer he comes to you. So what is possession according to you, may actually work as a runaway signal for most people around you whereas what is liberty or letting go according to you, may actually make you possess your near and dear ones with even greater strength.

Hence, the better a person you are and the more freedom you are willing to give to the people around you, the more closely they are going to stick to you. It may sound strange but it is a wise truth. Almost no one wants to leave a person who is good enough for them and who at the same time provides them sufficient freedom to enjoy their lives in their own ways, at times. On the contrary, most people will do anything to ensure that they don’t lose a person who is good and who is motivating and supporting them to make the most of their lives. Accordingly, they tend to stick closer to this person to let him know that he holds much value in their life and they don’t want to move away even if this person has given them choices and freedom to do so.

Understanding the root cause of this problem of being too possessive and then doing repeated conscious acts to treat this problem, will eventually get you rid of this problem and you will be able to get more from your life, especially in the sphere of relationships.

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To be Continued

Lord Shiva Bless You

Himanshu Shangari

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As this fear gets stronger, you talk to your girlfriend and tell her that she should not talk to this guy and in order to convince her, you may give her many reasons or logics why should she not talk to this guy. Your girlfriend may feel uncomfortable with your approach but since it is your first time or one of the first few times you have done such a thing to her, she may accept your wish and stop talking to that guy. As the time goes by, you keep telling her not to speak to this guy, that guy and many other guys and as the number of guys she can’t speak to increases, her level of discomfort also increases and this is where she feels the need to move away from you as you are restricting her choices according to your wish and this is something no one likes.

Hence she may decide to keep talking to many such guys, you have asked her not to talk to. This creates tension between the two of you and you try even harder to convince her not to talk to these guys and not do many other things also which you have told her to stop doing but she keeps doing them. The harder you try to stop her, the worse your situation becomes and a point comes when your girlfriend finds you too much to handle and she decides to move away from you or break up with you.

Similarly, you may keep investigating her Facebook, Whatsapp or other social networking activities and you may keep asking her about her equation or relation with a particular person or more than one person she’s been interacting with, through one of her social networking profiles. As you keep demanding more and more explanations about who is this person, who is that person, why are you talking to or chatting with him so much, and all other such type of questions which convey a message to her that you doubt and restrict her; she starts feeling more and more uncomfortable and restricted in this relationship.

Finally a stage comes when driven by your continuous doubts and restrictions, she breaks up with you and instead of realizing your mistake, you start thinking that your doubts were true and she was not loyal to you. Such thoughts give even more strength to your habit of being too possessive due to which, you start investigating the affairs of your new girlfriend with even more intensity which is obviously going to cause more problems only. The outcome is obvious, which is the fact that you are going to lose this girlfriend too, sooner or later. You see, you have lost one more girlfriend only due to your habit of being too possessive and it is not just one girlfriend or one person, but you are going to lose many more important and dear people with the passage of time, due to this negative habit of being too possessive. Hence you should consider treating this negative habit before it causes too much damage.

Looking at some ways to treat this habit, start releasing your possessions one by one, and from a small scale. At the first level, start giving away your old and useless clothing items or any other such items mentioned above that you may have kept even when you don’t have any use for them. In order to get best results, either give these items to needy people if they can still be used by someone, or throw them away if they can’t be used by anyone at all, instead of exchanging them for something in return. Care should be taken that you should not give away many of your old items in a single go at this first level and you should start giving them away one by one separated by some time.

This is due to the reason that if you give away many of your unused items at once, you may do so in a bout of motivation but your subconscious mind is not prepared for such a big release of your possessions and accordingly, it will start giving you very bad feelings or vibes and it will start making you feel uncomfortable. When it happens, you will start regretting your decision of giving away these things and you may decide to quit this whole practice altogether. In the worst case, you may even try to get back some of the things you have given away as you have a strong feeling of loss inside you and you want to undo this loss.

Hence start this practice by giving away such things at first, which are small, useless and which at the same time, you feel the most comfortable to release. This way, you are only doing a small conscious act of giveaway and through this act; you send a signal to your subconscious mind that you are now ready to release your possessions. Your subconscious mind will definitely put resistance but as it is a small giveaway and you are not much attached to it, you can definitely do it with some will power and with the help of your conscious mind. Once you have done it, wait for a day or two and then give away the next thing on your list which is once again small, useless for you and the one you are not much attached to.

As you keep releasing these items on regular intervals, say one of them every day, you keep sending more and more signals to your subconscious mind that you now want to release some of your possessions and you are no more a too possessive person. As more and more of these signals reach your subconscious mind by virtue of these specifically targeted conscious acts, your subconscious mind starts paying attention to these new messages and accordingly, it starts sending fewer fears and less resistance when you want to let go of something that you possess. As this practice continues, these messages start taking the shape of a script and once this script starts replacing the old script, your subconscious mind stops sending any fears or resistance and instead, it starts motivating you to release more and more of such items which have limited or no use for you.

Finally, a time comes when you start feeling that in order to let go of some of your possessions, you don’t have to think much and you don’t have to do much conscious effort and it is all being done naturally and easily, which means your subconscious mind is doing it now; you are ready for the next level.

At the next level, start sharing some of your things and possessions with your near and dear ones. At this level, these are not the things which are useless for you but these are the things which are useful for you but you still share them with your near and dear ones, as and when they need these things. For example, if a friend asks you for your car for a couple of days and you can afford to do so as you have one or more than one other cars which are sufficient for you, go ahead and lend him your car. At this stage you may still feel uncomfortable while lending your car as you are still recovering from the negative habit of being too possessive, but this feeling of being uncomfortable is not very strong now and you can deal with and win over this feeling with conscious effort and will power.

At the same time, your subconscious mind will also motivate you somewhat, to lend this car to your friend though it may also send some fears telling you not to lend your car to your friend. This is due to the reason that even at this stage, the old script of being too possessive has not been completely replaced by the new script of letting go, and it has only been partly replaced. Therefore, you might get mixed signals from your subconscious mind where some of these signals come in form of fears stopping you from doing so and some of these signals may come in form of motivational voices, asking you to go ahead and do it. Since your subconscious mind is divided at this stage and your conscious mind is on your side, the chances are fairly high that you will be able to lend your car to your friend.

As you complete this task, you send one more signal to your subconscious mind that you are now ready to release or share, even the possessions which are bigger and useful and this message makes more changes to the script written on your subconscious mind. Now start doing more and more of such conscious acts of giving away or sharing your things or possessions with other people around you who may need them from time to time. As you keep sharing and releasing your possessions more and more, you send more and more messages to your subconscious mind where these messages say that you now wish to release and share even your valuable possessions. With such repeated messages, the old script written on your subconscious mind becomes weaker and weaker whereas the new script gains more and more strength.

You can now start lending money also to your friends or relatives who need this money from time to time and you will find that it is not very difficult for you to do so now. This is once again due to the reason that your subconscious mind is now working more and more according to the new script written on it and by you, through your conscious efforts and hence your subconscious mind stops putting resistance when you wish to engage in one of such acts. On the contrary, your subconscious mind starts motivating you to engage in more and more such acts as this is what the new script says and accordingly, the subconscious mind supports you and gives you feelings of comfort whenever you chose to engage in one such act.

If you like this book and are capable of buying it, kindly buy it on Amazon and kindly write a review about the book. Your purchase helps us provide more and more free content to needy people and your review helps other people make their decision about the book.

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To be Continued

Lord Shiva Bless You

Himanshu Shangari